Sunday, April 20, 2008

Ever went to bed early
and
sleep wasn't within
your reach yet?

Yesterday was no exception for me..
All alone
in my pitch dark room..
My thoughts began to wonder
and
images from the back
of
my mind
floated to the front..

It was 2001..
I was admitted in the hospital
and
had to stay there for a week..
Well...
Went in thinking my plight was the worst
when
GOD decided to open my eyes to the surrounding..
There was this 'girl' beside me
who looked very pale and aneroxic..
She was losing her hair
and
had to be on drips nearly 24/7.
During the initial days,
I didn't notice her much
as
I was going through
my own turmoil.
but
when she came forward
to console me
during my sleepless nights,
I couldn't help wondering
what was wrong with her..
and
I got my answer soon..
from her..
She was suffering from leukemia..
She said she knew
her days were numbered
and
that she couldn't afford to waste
even one moment
mourning
away..
coz to her,
life was indeed
very
precious
every moment
was
a blessing..
She's in my mind
till now
not only coz of
her
strength and determination
but
also because
of
the other soul
who was there
with her
through day and night.
Her boyfriend..
From what I saw
no one else visited her..
Only he was there throughout..
Looking at her and holding her hands
when she slept
There were times
where tears would just
slip out of his eyes
and
he would catch me looking at them..
He would just gimme
this heart wrenching smile..
It said a thousand words..
and
when he takes a nap,
she will be looking at him,
clutching on to his hands.
It was unbearable to think
that those two didn't
have much time
together
even
As a third party..
I felt the pain..
They knew
the pain of losing..
coz their time
on the
clock was ticking away
faster
then the others..
How many times
have we neglected
our loved ones
when they said something
out of concern..
how many times
have we not given a damn
about those who really love us..?
Even when they are right
in front of our nose,
we tend to look further
or
keep searching at other venues
till the day
where realization hits hard
and
then
they are completely out of reach..
Must we be pushed
into extremes to value
love..care..concern
and simple bonds
that can make a difference
in our everyday
life..?
It doesn't have
to be a
boyfriend or a girlfriend.
Everyone has a meaning
in
everybody's life..
but how often
do we really know
the importance of each of us?
When it comes to
work and play,
we hear people saying
24 hours is not enough..
but how long
is it gonna take for you
to call and say
a Hi!
and
if it doesn't kill
'I missed you'
or
"just dropped a line to hear ur voice for a sec'..
We often whine
when stress is at its peak
and
we find ourself submerged with work..
but can you imagine a life
without
work,play and all those people
around
you?
Just how much is
it going to cost you
to show that
you really care
in simple ways..
Geez..
I think am going off track..
It happens doesn't it..?
When you are in solitude..
Things just start
revolving from A to B
and
all the way till Z..
As days are breezing away..
M coming to realize
without certain things in my life..
I will definitely go crazy..
I will still be breathing
but
as Loggie said
I will be in a 'vegetable' state..
and
because of this new realizations..
Am beginning to pray hard
for a blissful future..
I badly want what I want..
but then again
It will only be gifted
if HE alone thinks I deserve it..
So am on my knees now..
praying hard..
very very hard..
For without it..
Not only mine,
but
a few others' future
is also gonna be bleak..
darn bleak..

P.S: People,
Do not come
to conclusions
about what am praying for..
=P
I can bet
its not what
you have
in
your mind
rite now
=)

With that
'unfinished' note,
I will take
my leave now
coz am
done
blabbering
for
the day..
=)Take Care(=

=)Expect The Unexpected(=Reality Vs Dream =)Take Care(=